Song of the Thorn Bird

Song of the Thorn Bird

Friday, May 21, 2010

Catch, Release, and Go Fly a Falcon

“Honey, there are more fish in the sea. Throw that one back and find you a good one.”



Sure, that is what THEY say. You know the ones. Married for eleventy hundred years. Married back when naughty was boys pulling girls' pigtails, men were manly men, and the women cooked three squares a day…instead of opening three square boxes and heating them up (my favorite cooking style to date). And, you met your intended at a social and not via social networking. Married when marriage was truly forever and the photos to prove it were in sepia tone.


I am now nearly 42 and divorced for ten. Fishes my age don’t live too much longer and most don’t stay single that long….well the ones worth catching and keeping anyways. All the others flailing around are charter members of the Catch and Release Program (them being the ones released). There may be “more fish in the sea”, but at my age my sea has shrunk to a bracken fish-hatchery filled with nothing but in-bred options. All the keepers have already swum upstream snatched by all those “fly” fishermen. I am left with those too lazy and too weak to even bother swimming in the right direction out of the tank. Hell, the few that might have gotten caught in some unsuspecting net were tossed back quicker than it takes a fish to flop to his death in a fisherman’s basket.


Just in case you’re wondering, I don’t believe there are any good ones left in the sea…or the hell-hole, water hole I have been floundering in. So I think I might just stop fishing all together. I’m going to take up something more worthy of my time. Like falconry. Now that is something on which I can put my stamp of approval. Hint: in this fable, I am the keen-eyed falcon with the razor sharp talons….watch out my pretty little prey. Here comes the delusioned divorcee.
Sponsored by Willow at Magpie Tales.  Go on over and read a spell!

19 comments:

The Crusty Crone said...

hahahaha oh this is good! And great descriptions. Made me chuckle out loud with recognition. hahahaha

Berowne said...

A spirited defense of the single-o life. Congratulations.

Chrissy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
brenda said...

Excellent take on the prompt. You had me laughing. I love your profile pick with the frog.

Falconry...it works.

Chrissy said...

Lisa, I have to agree w/you... I am 55, widowed for 9 yrs., had a 5 year relationship w/ a man that I thought would be my final relationship but ended up w/me dumping Mr. Entitlement.. What gets me are the men and women who want to date someone 20 or 30 yrs. their jr... are they nuts? do they think someone 20/30 yrs. younger would want to date them? come on... The biggest kick is seeing how people lie on their profiles and think that no one can see thru them..
Its better being single than settling for what is trolling thru those sites.

kathew said...

Better to soar with the eagles than swim with the fishes....excellent and I can totally relate.

willow said...

I think I'm gonna stop telling my kids are are plenty of fish in the sea.

Simonides said...

In reading this I imagined you as a female Don Quixote... sans Sancho Panza - coming to the conclusion that perhaps your Dulcinea del Toboso - is more of a myth than a reality.

You know Cervantes made sure Don Q was having more chasing the myth than wallowing in reality. I think the book a turn for the morose as Don Q regained his sanity.

Tumblewords: said...

Three cheers for falconry. This clever piece probably resonates with a world of singles (by choice or not). Excellent writing.

Everyday Goddess said...

So much truth and so well written. Great Magpie!

middle child said...

I'm pretty sure that if you stop fishing, you will be surprised to find a few fish will just jump into the boat.

sheri... said...

oh my goodness, what's not to like about every single line in your magpie!!?? i love your tongue-in-cheek humor and the sarcasm is as thick as cheap peanut butter! this is so, SO well written...all leading up to a fantastic and painful ending...bet he won't see that one coming ;)

Big Mama Cass said...

I am having a bit of deja vu all the sudden... LOL

Brian Miller said...

smiles. i already caught you on the other site. glad you posted it on both...i think it apropo. so you sharpening those talons this weekend. smiles.

R. Burnett Baker said...

You gave me a smile and chuckle on a weekend when I'm feeling like the fish that got left in that small pond!

Rick

Lyn said...

I remember when I was very young..and it was only catch of the day that I was interested in..and fun fun fun! Now it's friends, for sure..like your mag!

Peg said...

Interesting comment on single life - great take on the prompt!

Tammy said...

Wonderful! It made me giggle.

The Reader said...

That was so fun to read. Loved the surprise ending...great commentary on the "single" life. :)

"Watch out my pretty little prey..."--loved that last line. :)